Brown Sugar and Banana Muffins (or cupcakes)

As I've said many times, baking is my stress relief. And thanks to the hot mess that education is in in this state, I have a whole lotta stress in my life right now. I don't think anyone, outside of education, really understands what it's like to be a teacher. The ridiculous way that teachers and schools are portrayed on TV doesn't help (I'm talking to you, Glee).

But beyond that, I'm not sure anyone, other than a fellow teacher, knows what kind of burden we deal with. English teachers have hours of essays to grade. Math teachers have building blocks of concepts to build on (and often rebuild). Social science teachers have eons of material to cover. And elective teachers, I'm finding, frequently are left in the dust.

I was hired as an English and journalism teacher. After my first year, I took over the struggling yearbook program. After my third year, I started a digital photography program. I carefully carved out a niche for myself--earning accolades for my organization, dedication and attention to detail along the way. I've helped put my school on the scholastic media map, so to speak. And I've exposed hundreds of kids to a world beyond Southern California, that many of them never knew existed.

As my media-based endeavors grew, my commitment in the English department lessened. And this year, in my fourth year of teaching, I found myself a full-time electives teacher. Which is AWESOME. I show up to work and I get to teach the FUN STUFF all day long. I have a schedule most people would dream of.

But with budget cuts looming, overall school enrollment dropping and general morale at all time low, my stomach is in knots. School is out in a month. I have no idea what I'm teaching next year. I have worked my ass off to build some spectacular programs, and I feel like I am grasping and threads as someone unravels my world in front of me.

The hardest part? Me, the control freak, has no control over my situation. I am sharing some of my programs with another teacher, who has seniority over me, despite the fact that I created the programs. I don't have as many students in my publications courses as I have in the past--which was intentional. A staff of 80 is just too much to manage! But now that I've built up these programs, I seem to have created a reputation as THE person to save struggling programs. So rather than giving my infant programs time to grow and mature, they are being pulled away from me, and another dying program is being dumped in my lap.

Of course, none of this is set in stone. It could all change August 3. Or August 17. Or tomorrow. And I just get to roll with the punches. I guess I should be flattered that everyone thinks I can take on the world and fix everything. But really? Someday, I'd like to be able to come home after school and bake. Just bake. For myself. And not worry about going back for deadline. Or an awards night. Or this. Or that. Ya know?

So, as I sit here, wondering what will become of me, I'm giving in to my vices. Stress baking starts now.

You can call these muffins. You can put frosting on them and call them cupcakes. But whatever you do, you better call them delicious.

Brown Sugar Banana Muffin-cakes

Adapted from How Sweet It Is

Simple, yet delicious. And really, muffins are just cupcakes without make up on, right?

1 1/3 cups flour
1 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
pinch of nutmeg
dash of cinnamon
1 egg
3/4 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3.5 large ripe bananas
1/4 cup sour cream
1/2 cup butter, melted

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line a muffin tin with liners.

Whisk together dry flour, salt, baking soda, cinnamon and nutmeg and set aside.

With an electric mixer, mix egg and add brown sugar, mixing until smooth. Mix in vanilla.

Add sour cream and melted butter and mix until just combined.

Stir in dry ingredients, then add bananas (don't even bother mashing---just toss 'em in!) and mix until batter comes together. The batter will be thick.

Scoop batter in liners and fill about 2/3 full. Bake for 15-18 minutes. Let cool completely.

Strawberry Protein Bites

I never fancied myself a runner. Even as my running routines have increased, I never classified myself in "that" category. I've gotten to a point where I actually enjoy running and do actually look forward to my weekly distance endeavors. But when I drag my butt along the boardwalk at the beach, I never dream of classifying myself in the same category as the "real" runners who smoke past me, barely breaking a sweat.

But the reality is... I think I am nearing that category. I'm running a half marathon in two weeks. Me. Thirteen miles. The thought terrifies me. And excites me. The feeling of accomplishment that comes with breaking a new personal record, adding a mile or just surviving, is incredible. These feelings have come, more and more regularly, as my training regimen has increased.

Other feelings have become more frequent, too. Like hunger. Oh my lord, I am hungry. Running ten miles puts a pit in your tummy like nothing else. But the trade off? Burning a thousand calories makes me far less critical of what I put in my mouth. But it's also made me realize that what I'm eating really does matter. With little 5ks here and there, and maybe a 10k every once in a while, my meal preparation hasn't played a major role in my training.

But now, with running maps rolling out in front of me that are ten plus miles long, I'm realizing that I need to feed my body more effectively. Putting the right things into it help me get the kinds of results I want out of myself. And learning how to effectively prepare things to support my efforts has been both challenging and exciting, in the realm of my kitchen. Combining my newest addiction (tacking on miles), with my most popular addiction (baking), has been a deliciously rewarding experience.

These yummy morsels are both healthy and delicious. They also provide an adequate amount of protein and give you a wonderful, flavorful boost of energy before or after a workout. And, you don't have to feel bad about popping a few of them in your mouth every time you walk by the kitchen.

Strawberry-Almond Protein Bites

adapted from Baking Serendipity 

• 1 cups rolled oats
• 1/4 cup raisins
• 1/4 cup dark chocolate pieces
• 1/4 cup ground flaxseed
• 1/4 cup chopped walnuts or almonds
• 1/4 cup fresh strawberries, diced
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/8 teaspoon nutmeg
• 1/2 cup almond butter
• 1/3 cup honey
• 1/4 agave

In a medium sized mixing bowl, combine oats, raisins, flaxseed, nuts, chocolate, strawberries, cinnamon and nutmeg. Add almond butter, agave and honey and stir to coat evenly. Refrigerate for at least an hour. Using an ice cream scoop or tablespoons, form the bites into balls. Store in the fridge in an airtight container.

She's Baaaaaaaaack!

I know, it's been too long. But I can explain...

It was Lent. I sacrificed my blogging for Lent. And before anyone freaks out---yes, I know I am not Catholic. In fact, I wouldn't even describe myself as religious, or spiritual. But to me, Lent was about testing my will power.

Shortly before Lent started, I was reading an article that talked about the reasons behind the practice. The article pointed out that it wasn't something that was distinctly Christian, or even anything that had clearly defined roots in any religious practice. The idea was that individuals would identify their vices, their short-comings, their challenges, and then spend 40 days working to improve themselves in those areas. It got me thinking... What are my vices? What keeps me from doing the things I need to do, the things I should do? What is holding me back?

The answer to that was easy. Cupcakes. Have a bad day? Bake cupcakes. Need to relax? Bake cupcakes. Feel bad for giving students a pop quiz? Bake cupcakes. Need a favor from someone? Bake cupcakes. Bored? Bake cupcakes. Hungry? Bake cupcakes. Happy? Bake cupcakes. I realized, pretty immediately (or maybe it was never really a secret) that cupcakes were a pretty big weakness of mine. So I decided--that was it. No cupcakes until after Easter. That meant--no eating, baking, buying, selling, gifting... anything. And oh trust me, I wanted to. And I was tempted. And people were disappointed. My students, first and foremost, took personal offense to my efforts. My friends, also, were not pleased with my choices. But I had to try and do this for myself.

If you know me, you know that over the past several years, I have had some great demonstrations of will power. I have also had some supreme failures. But I really wanted to prove to myself that I could do this. I could give up something that had come to define me. It was my trademark. But I could let it go. I could still exist without the apron and the frosting bag.... Right?

And I did. Life went on. I missed my cupcake madness. But I forced myself to do other things. I found that my evenings were more productive when I didn't try and bake 4 dozen cupcakes after work. I found that my kitchen stayed a little bit cleaner when there wasn't a trail of flour that traced my journey from cabinet, to counter, to oven. I found that my bank account stayed a little bit fatter if I wasn't rushing out to buy butter, eggs and flour every other day.

I also realized that I am not a one-trick pony. Believe it or not, I can bake other things. I make a mean lemon meringue pie. I finally faced my fears and tackled cheesecake. I've dabbled in the vegan baking world some more. I've funneled my energy into finding healthy, satisfying, low-calorie dinners that are easy to prepare so that Nick can help me more in the kitchen. In terms of cupcakes, I say lesson learned. Yes, I will go back to baking them... In fact, I have an order to put out today. But I think I'm going to slow it down... And bake with a purpose--not just because I'm bored. Not just because I saw a recipe that looked interesting. With Summer rapidly approaching, I know that I need to start pinching my pennies and putting the brakes on constant cupcake cooking might be a good way to do that. But don't worry kids... First current events quiz? You'll get cupcakes. I promise.

So now you're saying... But why the blog? Where baking is a physical vice for me---something that I would do to make myself feel better, make myself relax, get my head cleared up... Writing is a mental vice. Now, as an English teacher, one wouldn't think that I would associate something like a vice with a skill like writing. And it most cases, I wouldn't. But every time I tied my apron strings, I found myself thinking about posts and recipes and pictures. It started to take a little fun out of what I was doing. In a sense, there were times when cooking and writing about it felt like a chore. I didn't want that. I started this blog to catalog all of the fun I was having--my baking, cooking and experimenting adventures. And my writing has always been an escape for me. I knew I would miss jotting things down, telling my little stories... But I also knew that they would be here when I got back. I had to put writing for fun on hold last year, to finish my thesis. And this year, I needed to refocus. I needed to reflect. I needed to rework my process.

And so it was decided... To put the fun back into my kitchen, the blog needed a time out. I kept on cooking, but I cooked for me. I didn't have to worry about taking pictures or jotting down my measurements or thinking of ways to describe my process. I was able to focus my energy in a single direction and simply enjoy what I was doing---not to say that I didn't enjoy it before, I definitely did, but I felt like I got back to cooking purely. Cooking for cooking. And eating. Not cooking for blogging.

And I didn't tell you sooner because... Well, it felt less like an actual sacrifice if I had to make a disclaimer for it. If I had to explain all my reasons before I even tried to do it, then it was like I had to talk myself into it all over again. So I just went for it... Knowing that you, my loyal blog readers, would understand. I did this for US! :)

I've learned that I am talented. In the kitchen and at the keyboard. I've learned that I'm messy. In the kitchen, and in my head. I've learned that I am flexible and I can experiment. I can deviate from a recipe to make it vegan, and it still works. I can adjust measurements if I don't think they flavor will capture what I want. I can do a whole hell of a lot more than cupcakes. Sure, they will continue to be my trademark. They are what makes me tick. But I can do so much more. I am, without a doubt, a little one-woman bake shop.

So keep reading. I am back. And I'm back for good. I will continue to try and keep up with at least one post a week, but you will have to forgive me when life gets in the way. Because life will happen. I will get busy. But I won't let cupcakes, blogging or anything else, keep me from getting where I need to be and doing what I need to do.

But of course, we know that my real mission here is to save the world... one cupcake at a time.

Dinner & Dessert!

Four day weekends are glorious.

For as terrible as I felt yesterday, I am at the other end of the spectrum today. Maybe it was the 5.5 mi run this morning. Maybe it was an entire day of lounging around yesterday. Maybe it was two solid nights of 10 or more hours of sleep. Maybe it's a combination of all of those things.

Whatever it is? Be thankful. Don't question. Because I have taken that energy and after cleaning up the garage, doing mountains of laundry, organizing the linen closet, grocery shopping, bill paying and pruning the hell out of my fruit trees, I still have enough zip to put together a dinner that promises to be just delicious.

If you know me at all, you know that most of my meals are meatless, or only involve chicken. And lately, there's been a whole lotta tofu in my kitchen. BUT, I took a leap of faith today. I've been doing a lot of reading about how your diet effects your workouts, energy and stamina. I'm trying to mix things up a bit and make my kitchen adventures a little more exciting. So, pork is making a fairly rare appearance on my menu. Along with some other, more familiar, ingredients.

Read, salivate, enjoy.

I'll set an extra place at my dinner table for you tonight.

Apple-Stuffed Acorn Squash

 photo by Jessica Y.

Apples + squash = yum!

• 1 medium acorn squash
• 1 cup chopped, tart apple
• 4 teaspoons honey
• 2 teaspoons butter
• 1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1 teaspoon brown sugar 

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2. Cut squash in half; discard seeds. Place squash cut side up in a loaf pan. Pierce the inside of the squash several times with a fork. Rub brown sugar on the inside of the squash.
3. Dice apples, toss with cinnamon and nutmeg. Fill centers of the squash with apple. Cover and bake  for 30 minutes.
4. In a microwave-safe bowl, combine the honey and butter. Cover and microwave on high for 15-20 seconds or until butter is melted. Drizzle over squash. Sprinkle with a little more cinnamon and brown sugar. Bake, uncovered, 25-30 minutes longer or until tender. 

Caramel Apple Pork Chops

adapted from All Recipes.com

 photo by Jessica Y.

I don't know about you, but it's not all that often that these guys find their way into my dinners.

• 4 pork chops
• 1 teaspoon vegetable oil
• 2 tablespoons brown sugar
• salt and pepper to taste
• 1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
• 2 tart apples - thinly sliced
• 3 tablespoons pecans (optional)

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. 
2. Arrange chops in a baking dish with a lid.
3. In a small bowl, combine brown sugar, salt and pepper, cinnamon and nutmeg. 
4. Add butter to a  skillet and melt. Stir in brown sugar mixture and apples. Cover and cook until apples are just tender. Remove apples with a slotted spoon and arrange on top of chops. Keep warm in the preheated oven.
5. Continue cooking sauce uncovered in skillet, until thickened slightly. Spoon sauce over apples and chops. 
6. Return chops, apples and sauce to the oven. Bake, covered for 25 minutes.
7. Sprinkle with pecans and bake uncovered for 10 minutes.

Super Creamy, Dreamy, Rich and Delicious

Reese's Massacre Ice Cream

Adapted from the Ultimate Ice Cream Book

 photo by Jessica Y.

Peanut butter, Chocolate, Ice Cream... Heaven. 

• 1 cup sugar
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 7 large egg yolks
• 1 1/2 cups half and half
• 1 cup heavy cream
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
• 10 mini Reese's, chopped
• 1 handful chocolate chips, chopped
• 2 tablespoons creamy peanut butter

1. Beat the sugar, salt and egg yolks together in a medium bowl. Beat until thick and pale yellow. Set aside.
2. Bring the half and half to a simmer in a medium pot.
3. Slowly pour the half and half into the egg yolk mixture. Stir to combine.
4. Pour the egg/half and half mixture back into the pot. Return the pot to the heat.
5. Cook until the egg custard thickens, stirring constantly.
6. Pour the custard through a strainer into a large, clean bowl.
7. Allow the custard to cool slightly and then stir in the cream and vanilla.
8. Cover and refrigerate overnight, or until cold.
9. Poor the custard into ready ice cream maker and follow the device's directions.
10. In the last 5-7 minutes of the mixing cycle, add chopped candies and peanut butter.
11. Transfer to a freezer-safe container and let freeze for about 2 hours.

Chicken, Spinach and Gnocchi Soup

You may or may not be aware that I don't have a heater. If you know me at all, you must know... because I've been complaining about it relentlessly since September. I've been in a back and forth war with my home warranty company since the end of summer, and it seems that everyone just wants to pass the buck. But, as sad as that is, it's not the point.

Being a teacher, I worship, crave and live for my long weekends and extra days off. I know there are plenty of people out there who think, Oh, but you have summers off... Right, I do. But guess what I? I don't get paid during the summer. And I work 10 to 12 hour days, often, during the school year. But also, again, this is not my point.

But these things are coming together. I have a long weekend. And my heater doesn't work. And it's cold. And I'm sick. I can't seem to get warm, my throat is raw, like someone raked over it with sand paper and thumbtacks. My body hurts. My brain is full of snot.

I am determined not to let this dang cold ruin what is left of my weekend. There are too many runs to enjoy and too many group X classes that I need to take. And if I choose to lie around on the couch all day, I want to do it by choice, not by default.

So I am making myself better. With soup. Delicious, creamy, healthy soup. And you should make it, too. It's the yummiest! I'm fairly certain that you don't need to be sick to enjoy this, but I may also market this as an absolute cure-all. One bowl and I'm already feeling better!

Sign me up for five miles AND bootcamp tomorrow!

Gnocchi, Chicken and Spinach Soup

adapted from allrecipes.com

photo by Jessica Y.

Full of yummy veggies, shredded chunks of chicken and just enough creaminess to call it perfection.

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 small onion, diced
• 3 stalks celery, diced
• 1 green bell pepper, diced
• 2 small sweet chili peppers, diced
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 carrots, shredded
• 1 pound cooked,  shredded chicken
• 4 cups chicken broth
• 1 (16 ounce) package mini potato gnocchi
• 1 (6 ounce) bag baby spinach leaves
• 1 can evaporated milk
• salt and ground black pepper to taste

1. Heat olive oil in a large pot over medium heat. Cook onion, celery, garlic, and carrots in the hot oil until onion is translucent, about 5 minutes. 
2. Stir in cubed chicken and chicken broth; bring to a simmer.
3. Stir gnocchi into the simmering soup and cook until they begin to float, 3 to 4 minutes. 
4. Stir in spinach; cook until wilted, about 3 additional minutes.
5. Stir evaporated milk into the simmering soup. Cook until soup thickens slightly, about 5 minutes. Season to taste with salt and black pepper.

Peanut Butter Cup Cupcakes

Chocolate.

Peanut butter.

What more could you want?

I think that combination is a deadly vice for many people, myself included. Luckily, these cupcakes are rich and creamy enough that just one satisfies that craving... and pairs perfectly with a glass of chocolate milk.

I came across this recipe in our Sunday paper. After a few tweaks and adjustments, I think I've got a winner. I brought these to school and they were gone in a matter of minutes, if that's any indication.

photo by Jessica Y.

A magical marriage of chocolate and peanut butter.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Cupcakes


For the filling:

• 1 cup confectioners’ sugar
• ¾ cup creamy peanut butter
• 4 tbsp. unsalted butter, at room temperature
• ½ tsp. vanilla extract

For the cake:

• 1 2/3 cups all-purpose flour
• ¾ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
• 1 tsp. baking soda
• ½ tsp. salt
• 1 cup sour cream
• 2 tbsp. milk
• 1 tsp. vanilla extract
• 8 tbsp. unsalted butter, at room temperature
• 1½ cups sugar
• 2 large eggs

For the frosting:

• 8 oz. cream cheese, at room temperature
• 4 tbsp. unsalted butter, softened
• ½ cup creamy peanut butter
• 3¼ cups confectioners’ sugar
• 1 cup frozen whipped topping, thawed

1. Preheat the oven to 350° F.  Line two cupcake pans with paper liners.
2. To make the filling, combine the confectioners’ sugar, peanut butter, butter and vanilla extract in a bowl.  Beat with an electric mixer on medium speed until well combined.  Roll the mixture into 1-inch balls (at least 24) and set aside on a baking sheet.
3. To make the cake batter, combine the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda and salt in a medium bowl; whisk together and set aside.  In a liquid measuring cup, stir together the sour cream, milk and vanilla extract.  In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, combine the butter and sugar, and beat on medium-high speed until light and fluffy, about 2 minutes.  Beat in the eggs one at a time.  With the mixer on low speed, alternately add the dry ingredients and the sour cream mixture, beginning and ending with the dry ingredients.  Mix just until incorporated.
4. Spoon a tablespoon or two of batter into the bottom of each cupcake liner.  Place a ball of the peanut butter filling in each cupcake well and top with the remaining batter so that all the cups are filled.  Bake for 18-22 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. 
5. To make the frosting, combine the cream cheese, butter and peanut butter until smooth.  Slowly mix in the confectioners’ sugar, beating until smooth and well blended.  Mix in the whipped topping until smooth and fluffy.

Vegan Chocolate Mint Chip Ice Cream

As if the holidays themselves weren't bad enough, my ice cream maker has been overdrive over the last few weeks.

I've spend hours at the gym and logged many miles in my running shoes.

Just so I can eat and make way too much ice cream.

My most recent attempts?

You might call it unusual. Peculiar.

Some may even call it disgusting.

But no joke? I call it delicious.

Mint Chip with Kale Ice Cream

photo by Jessica Y.

Minty. Delicious. And totally vegan.

    4 or 5 cups of fresh kale
    1 cup vanilla soymilk
    1 block of silken firm tofu (12.3 oz)
    1/2 cup sugar
    1 teaspoon mint extract
    1/4 cup mild flavored oil (vegetable is fine)
    1/2 cup vegan chocolate chips

1. Rinse kale leaves and squeeze dry.  Tear them into bite sized chunks and put into blender.

2. Pour soymilk into blender and blend the mixture until smooth and green.

3. Add tofu and sugar to mixture in blender then blend until smooth.

4. Add mint extract and oil then again blend until smooth.

5. Taste your mixture and add additional sugar and/or mint in small increments to suit your taste. Then blend again.

6. Chill mixture until you're ready to freeze it.

7. Pour mixture into your ice cream maker and make ice cream via your machines instructions.

8. Add chocolate chips when the mixture is about slushy consistency. (I use a bowl that's stored in the freezer and added chocolate chips about 10 minutes into mixing process)

9. When it's the desired consistency, scoop into a bowl and enjoy!!